Lo que hice estas vacaciones (un fanfic de Mundodisco)

No sé si os he contado que hace unos años me apunté a clases de inglés en la Escuela Municipal de Idiomas. No hacen examen ni dan título oficial, pero me lo paso bien, hago un poco de vida social con menores de ochenta años y me da puntos para el trabajo. Y, bueno, sí, además aprendo un poco de inglés. Cuando salga "Vientos de invierno" ya tendré el nivel suficiente para entenderlo sin tener que esperar dos años más a la traducción. O igual tengo ya cataratas y tengo que pedirle a alguien que me lo lea...

El caso es que ahora ¡por fin! estamos estudiando el pasado. Y de deberes teníamos que escribir una redacción sobre nuestras vacaciones. Lamentablemente, mis vacaciones son muy aburridas. Básicamente: "me levanté tarde, le puse los colirios a Señorpadre, paseé a Keko, me puse a hacer cosas domésticas, comí, hice la siesta, volví a pasear a Keko, volví a ponerle colirios a Señorpadre,  hice la cena y me fui a dormir". A mi me gustan, pero a mis lectores creo que no tanto.

Así, que, como la profe dijo que podíamos echarle imaginación, pues... lo he hecho. He escrito un fanfic en el que me voy de vacaciones a la fantabulosa Ankh-Morpork.

Pido disculpas "de hantebraso" por todos los crímenes cometidos contra la ortografía y la gramática. Y ya advertidos, os dejo mi obra maestra (acabo de enviársela a la profe por correo electrónico, así que ya no hay vuelta atrás): "WHAT I DID LAST HOLLIDAYS" (¡¡¡CON MIL ELEFANTES!!!)

WHAT I DID LAST HOLLIDAYS

By Condesadedia

Last Hollidays, my friend Igorina and I went to the wonderfull city of Ankh-Morpork. Ankh Morpork is the most important city of Discworld, a planet that flies by space over four elephants, who rest over the shell of a space turtle named Gran A´tuin.

Ankh-Morpork is a very ancient and historic city. Its a cold and foggy city, but also very pretty. The River Ankh is a little stinky, and his water is almost solid, but is also a picturesque sight.

First day, We were sightsiting. We visited the Palace of Lord Vetinari, the Tyrant of the city, the headquarters of the Night Watch and the Assansins Guild, the Sator Place and the Unseen University, where young men studies magic (unfortunately, they don’t allow girls). We visit also The Shadows, a very tyipical neighborhood where We knowed a lot of interesting people, and We were assaulted by a registered member of Robbers’ Guild. A unregistered member tried to assault us, too, but a nice couple of Night Watch Officers arrested him.

At night, we went to dinner in a nice place named The Broken Drum, and we saw a epic barbarian fight. We were chased to the hotel by an adorable baul with a lot of little feet, and by no so adorable little dog who smelled very bad and spoke too much.

Second day, We visit the bridges over the River Ankh. We got lunch at Sham Harga’s Ribs’ House. There is a lot of exotic restaurants in Ankh-Morpork, but Sham Harga’s is the most famous. The ribs are delicious, but a little greasy and spicey.

Third day, We wished to visit the Ramkin’s Shelter for Abandoned Swamp Dragons, but unfortunately, we eated a hot dog what we bought to a street vendor named Ruin Dibbler, and we were sick, and we couldn’t see anymore.

Ankh-Morpork is a nice and excitant city, and we had a lot of fun. But we never sould eated that hot dog! 

¿Qué os ha parecido? ¿Van a aprobarme, a expulsarme, o a tirarme al barranco de Farja con plomos atados a los pies para que sea devorada por las pulgas?